Despite its inability to turn a profit, the New Carlisle Pool is being considered for a $60,000 cash influx next year, according to the 2016 budget proposal presented Monday.

The decision to keep the pool open rather than retain deputies in New Carlisle has caused controversy in town, and this budget proposal is sure to be polarizing. Main and Lake has come up with 5 better ways for New Carlisle to spend $60,000 than by pumping it into the local pool.

5. Bring Fireworks Back to New Carlisle

Many of you are old enough to remember when New Carlisle hosted its own fireworks shows every Fourth of July. Now, residents are forced to flock to neighboring cities to get their fireworks fix.

Bringing the summer fireworks show back would be a boon to the local economy, especially convenience stores that sell alcohol and eateries. It would also be a lovely event to bring the community together, something we desperately need these days. There is nothing more American than watching things explode while drinking beer and hanging out with loved ones, and last time I checked New Carlisle was in America. $60,000 would be much better served on validating our city’s patriotism.

4. Build an Enormous Statue of New Carlisle’s Own French Stewart

French Stewart was born on a dirt floor in a garage on Scarff Road, and he has risen from those humble beginnings to become a titan in Hollywood. New Carlisle could pay tribute to the master thespian’s trademark squint by erecting a $60,000 statue of the silver screen legend. Looking toward the future, a French Stewart monument would bring joy to the town for decades and would require minimal upkeep, unlike the pool, which loses money every summer and requires expensive maintenance just to remain open.

3. Purchase Salt for the Roads this Winter

As some of you may know, New Carlisle winters are harsh. The roads become borderline unnavigable, and the city has not had the money to pay for salt for our roads in recent years. While it is almost unconscionable that an entire city allows their roads to remain covered in slabs of foot-thick ice, there is no question that $60,00 could buy a lot of rock salt to help New Carlisle residents traverse the treacherous streets easier during the months of October through April.

A recent estimate of road salt costs determined that $60,000 could purchase roughly 240,000 lbs. of road salt, not accounting for discounts for buying in bulk. But hey, who cares about being able to drive somewhere in the winter without killing yourself or someone else when you can spend that money on a pool that is closed half of the time due to rain and loses money the other half of the time?

2. Hire Lee Greenwood to Play the Heritage of Flight Festival

Famous rock band Mumford and Sons drew over 8,000 campers to Troy in 2013 as part of their Gentlemen of the Road festival. The event boosted Troy’s economy as fun-seekers from all over made the trip to revel and make purchases from local restaurants and shops.

$60,000 should be enough to lure Lee Greenwood, singer of the classic song “God Bless the USA,” to play our Heritage of Flight Festival. With that kind of star power, New Carlisle could draw thousands for the event and make up the $60,000 ten times over. I’ll proudly stand up and lobby for Lee Greenwood to come to New Carlisle. Better that than to keep dragging along a pool that can’t make a buck.

1. Make it Rain off the Top of the New Year’s Eve Ball Drop

What is the best possible thing to do with money if you’re a city? Invest it in the community. I propose we do this literally.

The annual ball drop on New Year’s Eve has grown into a huge event for the city, and there are sure to be hundreds of folks parked on Main Street watching the festivities. I suggest strapping a person with a backpack full of $60,000 to the ball, raising him up in the air a hundred feet or so, and having him make it rain with the money. If you’re unfamiliar with “making it rain,” this video may help you understand.

This provides multiple advantages over using the money on the pool. First, it will drive people out to the celebration in record numbers, which, if strategized properly, can drive business in town. Second, people will catch the money and redistribute it into the local economy, providing a much needed shot in the arm to New Carlisle businesses. Third, it’s fun! With all the bad news we get on a daily basis, that has to count for something.

Hopefully the city adjusts their budget for next year. Any of these 5 suggestions are better ways to spend $60,000 in New Carlisle than the pool.